tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8466691337834051176.post3139415287627480761..comments2024-03-01T03:37:20.420-05:00Comments on I'M SOMEWHERE ELSE: 13. Social model of social failureAmanda Foresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04200794053287551087noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8466691337834051176.post-25869131904537467722010-11-14T22:27:33.858-05:002010-11-14T22:27:33.858-05:00Ah, I see what you're saying. Disability is a...Ah, I see what you're saying. Disability is a question of skills/abilities, but social failure is more about different communication styles. That makes sense.Mtthwhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08044477052374837348noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8466691337834051176.post-9313796228634707832010-11-14T18:29:46.435-05:002010-11-14T18:29:46.435-05:00This was an excellent serries. I'm glad you w...This was an excellent serries. I'm glad you wrote it.Zelliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00501958732832098738noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8466691337834051176.post-58795152836670968532010-11-14T13:44:06.395-05:002010-11-14T13:44:06.395-05:00Hi disemvowelled Matthew--
I do think disability ...Hi disemvowelled Matthew--<br /><br />I do think disability is socially constructed, but so is everything in the world, and that doesn't make it any less real. I think social skills on the other hand--as something that some people have, and some people don't--actually aren't real in any sense.<br /><br />I mean, if everyone had the same kind of brain problems I have, then they would be considered normal and not a disability (although I think we would still be living in caves so I'm glad that's not the case). But presently you can look at me and compare me to other people and say that I can't do things other people can do or I can't do them in the same way.<br /><br />But I don't think social skills can be judged as something that any individual person can and can't do because the people you're succeeding or failing to socialize with aren't objects. It's always two-way. That's why I think social skills can't be objectively judged like other skills (being able to read, being able to see).Amanda Forest Vivianhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06284158336100298682noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8466691337834051176.post-65879453439563101782010-11-13T23:26:10.890-05:002010-11-13T23:26:10.890-05:00It's especially nice to read this because a mo...It's especially nice to read this because a month or so ago I made the same conclusion (in essence) in regard to my own experiences with friendship failures/successes. So it's nice to see it written out with such clarity and detail. Good post.meanderingriverhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09814592647841488599noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8466691337834051176.post-40609296440153825402010-11-13T11:21:42.301-05:002010-11-13T11:21:42.301-05:00It takes two to talk.
Two to interact.
Brava.
I...It takes two to talk.<br /><br />Two to interact.<br /><br />Brava.<br /><br />I have more to say, but I think I'll say it to you later, because it's not fully formed yet.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8466691337834051176.post-84274291226059718322010-11-13T10:53:41.920-05:002010-11-13T10:53:41.920-05:00So what you are saying is that social skills are r...So what you are saying is that social skills are relative. I agree somewhat. I am infinitely better at being social with people that I know very well, and with new people it's a real mess. But this is due to brain functioning and the fact that I can't socially connect with people that I essentially have to "learn" from scratch. My mind is too busy interpreting their movements, tone, word choice, etc. Which is of course entirely different for every person I meet. My brain basically turns my social skills off since it's not a priority. If it were up to me, I would make it a priority. My favorite people tend to me "neurotypical", outgoing, talkative, and have good social skills with non-typical or disabled people. They are rare, but these are the people who end up being my friends. The fact that I and other people are judged and categorized as crazy/disabled because we have "bad" social skills (bad social skills being an example of social failure) certainly falls under the social model. There are clearly people who do not fan the flame of the social model of social failure (like those people who are my friends), but they are still in the minority. There are a few members of my family who basically treat me like I am a bad person because I lack social grace, but not everyone does that. Maybe that's a sign bad social skills are slowly becoming generally accepted like you mentioned blindness. Society as a whole has a lot to learn about neurology and invisible disabilities in general.Jesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06001020811877167957noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8466691337834051176.post-82205287861779515102010-11-13T10:25:28.711-05:002010-11-13T10:25:28.711-05:00So, if I understand you correctly, you're basi...So, if I understand you correctly, you're basically saying that social skills are socially constructed, in much the same way that disability is socially constructed. Is that it, or have I misunderstood you?<br /><br />The reason I ask is that this interpretation of what you're saying would seem to imply that disability doesn't exist either, which doesn't seem like something you would say.Mtthwhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08044477052374837348noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8466691337834051176.post-2659388311396626872010-11-12T23:00:31.079-05:002010-11-12T23:00:31.079-05:00I do definitely agree that the victim shouldn'...I do definitely agree that the victim shouldn't be blamed. And I don't really think a pack of bullies should be considered to have 'social skills'. I mean, hurting other people isn't something that social skills are supposed to be about.lux aeturnahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00391526866406089000noreply@blogger.com